Lucky girl! We all remember the case of the young girl who was raped and sentenced to death by stoning, don’t we? But wasn’t that in Somalia? I wonder what would happen if a British girl was sentenced to die by stoning …

I’m sure all this will send the vile Anjum Chaudry of “Let’s turn Britain into an Islam country” fame into bouts of apoplexy, but for the civilised world its really time that we got rid of this medieval Sharia …

Or maybe not? First doubts arose when they entered the zany Guildo Horn for the Eurovision Song Contest a few years ago – here’s what Wikipedia has to say about this entry…

“Written by television host Stefan Raab under the pseudonym “Alf Igel” (a reference to prolific composer Ralph Siegel), the song is a tongue-in-cheek parody of the schlager style for which Germany had become known at previous Contests. Horn (whose backing band’s name translates as “the Orthopedic Stockings”) sings about his desire to return to “a time of tenderness/When Caressing and Cuddling and Loving/Were always written with capitals” and “When I daily wrote in a poetry book:/Yoo hoo hoo – I love you”.”

While the song did not win, it is credited with rekindling German interest in the Contest, as well as paving the way for Raab’s own entry two years later with Wadde hadde Dudde da?. Following Austria‘s Boom Boom Boomerang and Belgium‘s Euro-Vision, it is considered to be the third parody song to make an appearance at the Contest.

With the rise of private television in the 80s, a number of comedians have appeared on the horizon to stand in line next to Germanys only previous comedian of note, Otto Waalkes. It is without a doubt that these people have changed the face of German humor in the last 20 years.

And now we not only have these people, but also a TV comedy series Stromberg that has already become a classic. Loosely based on the TV series “The Office” it also happens to be very funny!

But the real climax – which shows how far German humour has changed and developed – comes in a TV commercial, for a VW car of all things. In a blatent reference to the “Towel Wars” of the last few years between german and british tourists (which the respective tabloids “Bild” and “The Sun” made a big issue of), a young man is depicted in a car showroom examining a brand new VW Golf. He opens the door and is about to get into the car, when a couple stood some way behind them fling their bathtowels through the open window. They land perfectly on the seats of the car, and the woman then remarks – “I’m sorry, but this car is reserved for us” … marvellous!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXRKZzPjYV0

Who says they can’t make fun of themselves? 5 stars from me for the makers of this commercial …

Credits:
Guildo Horn Photo: Public Domain, taken by “Schlendrian”

Demi Moore, in an apparent huff, has released the original picture to prove that the accusations aren’t true, and all kinds of people have been adding their comments to the story. For instance “promi blogger” Perez Hilton added his remarks to the effect that even if her hips hadn’t been retouched, the rest of her certainly had.

But honestly, who cares anyway? I certainly don’t. Pictures of Demi Moore will be the closest I will ever get to her anyway, so what does it matter whether the Goddess is flawed or not?

German legend, former striker Uwe Seeler says he doesn’t think it would be to Robert’s linking to postpone the match, and we have all heard the adage “The Show Must Go On”. But must it?

After the tragic death of his daughter 3 years ago, Robert was on the pitch and playing within 7 days. It was his way of coming to terms with his loss. But, even though it is for the moment unproven and thus highly speculative, it looks as though he never did get over the death of his daughter, and it is likely that this was one of the reasons for his death. So did going on with the show do anything for him? And would he have wanted the match to go on?

More importantly: How can the grief stricken German players and public go on with the show under these circumstances? Just what is the point of the match?

Their arguments are hard to follow though, especially in light of the fact that Germany “stole” Mesut Özil, their mid-field star, from the Turks. I can well remember how german manager Jogi Löw pounced on the youngster, who is the son of turkish immigrants, and gave him a game in the national team after hearing reports that the Turks wanted him to play for Turkey.

However, this story will undoubtedly give the German Bild and the British Sun the chance to go for each others throats (hasn’t it been quiet since the arguments about towels on deckchairs), but I do see a problem the way that things are developing in national football teams.

Let’s have a look at the players who are currently playing for Germany. This could, to be honest, be any number of teams, but as I am familiar with this team, my choice has fallen.

Lucas Podolski (Poland), Miroslav Klose (Poland), Gerald Asamoah (Ghana), Kakau (Brazil), Sami Khedira (Tunisia),  Mesut Özil & Serdar Tasci (Turkey) all have their roots in countries outside of Germany. Looking at this line-up, I don’t see any reason at all for the tears of the “Bild”

Ballack was reported as saying that the German team deserved more after qualifying for the World Cup Finals next year in the last match against Russia a few days before.

What Ballack obviously fails to realise is that the public payed up to 80 Euros for a ticket for this match and rightly expect every man to do his best. When all is said and done, these people have turned him into a multi-millionaire.

One could be forgiven for thinking that a good many football stars have forgotten where they came from …

Michael Ballack pic by EnglishHorn73, licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Share Alike 3.0

Just when you’d given up hope, here I come with the last installment of the current edition of Name That Tune. I must admit to really needing a rest for a few weeks, but I hate leaving untied ends open. I’ll probably need a few weeks before starting the next edition, but stay tuned, you never know when it might get going.

The answers from Name That tune 3.19 are: Van Morrison – Brown Eyed Girl and Kenny Rodgers – Ruby, Don’t Take Your Love To Town.

Congratulations to Todd & Trish, Dan, Alan Novich, Renfield, Mschoblue, Andy, Daddyo, Debi, and Elvisaaron.

Interesting to see Andy call Brown Eyed Girl “one of the most overplayed songs ever”. Its never played over here

Over to the final clips for this time around, lets see what you make of them:

You may have noticed that I will be using this website in future for other things apart than Name That Tune. I don’t want to impose this on to you, but if you are interested, feel free to take part and say your bit

Enough said, over to the current table, where Alan could theoretically still be overtaken – the heat is on

Frotn page pic of Van Morrison was taken by Art Sigel and is licensed under a creative commons agreement

At a press conference a day or two ago, Guido refused to answer the question of a British journalist in english. When pressed, he said to the journalist (in german, of course) .. “We are in Germany, here we speak german”  expecting the journalist to pose his question via an interpreter.

So, what’s going on here then? Is Guido getting too big for his boots, or is he letting German patriotism hang out?

The answer to the question doesn’t appear to be quite that exotic. The simple truth appears to be: Guido’s english is not up to scratch. And he wants to become foreign minister?

In the meantime, the clever bods in his party have suggested that Guido might make a better economics minister … would he need english for that, I wonder?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4pQlkshzm4

Guido speaking english
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLYGPWQ0VjY

Photo by Dirk Vorderstraße, licensed under a creative commons agreement

The outcry over the detention of director Roman Polanski by fellow filmmakers, politicians and other people around the world is intolerable in my eyes. For God’s sake, we are talking about a person who has been convicted of drugging and raping a 13 year old girl, a person who has admitted his crime, a person who fled the USA to avoid punishment.

The question where was the girls mother at the time might be a good question (it is surely), but that doesn’t diminish the pain or anguish that the girl went through, and probably did for many years after … why it has taken so long to arrest him, is certainly a good one … but it doesn’t make him any less guilty.

So, why is everybody siding up with this man? Why is everyone so quick to condemn a person like Gary Glitter, but defend a convicted criminal? – and I’m not even going to start to talk about Michael Jackson. Why should normal people get the maximum penalty, but “stars” are expected to get off free?

At least, one consolation: 78% of readers of  the Bild (Germany’s largest tabloid) who voted on this subject, have said that they consider it “correct that Polanski should be arrested.”

So lets get him over to the USA so that he can pay for what he did … at long last

The picture of Roman Polanski was taken by Rità Molnar and is licensed under a Creative Commons License